In the book Eleanor Oliphant is completely fine, the author Gail Honeyman said, ‘People don’t like these facts. When someone asks you how you are you are meant to say FINE. You are not meant to say that you cried last night because you didnt talk to the other person for two consecutive days. FINE is what you say.’
And that truly states, how we all lie in that, ‘I’m good, what about you?’ as if the person will tell me. Atleast very close friends might but not all and it’s human tendency to ask this.
Even when people are walking and they live in two different blocks of a society, even while crossing each other they will ask, ‘Hi, how are you, all well?’ and the other would wave his hand to say, ‘Yes yes all good’.
People like our parents tend to say to everyone what their normal life is. Really. Not problems but whatever quotidian ongoings of their days – if they had a bank issue or someone’s health or a new product or oh fitness tips, even though they dont even damn talk to other person! Even though they are almost strangers! That’s why when our friends’ parents meet our own parents for the first time, I swear they can talk in an unending flow! I mean even I didn’t talk to my friend this much! They get acquainted to their daily life in just half an hour. No matter it takes us years to do so.
People of our generation tend to layer things probably because no ones going to understand but apart from that they are really left with nothing to say. Oh maybe they do have, ‘How are you?’
So Some Alternative you can try atleast to try to know the Truth:
- Hey, you dont seem okay. Hit me a text whenever you wish to talk!
- You know, I’m here only so we can talk.
- I know you are running too much, but try finding a loop hole to sit in peace for a second.
- Hey, sorry did we not catch up?
- I don’t know why it feels like you want to say something. I’m here to listen.
They might reply ‘Fine’ at the first but many a times after 20 minutes, my friend ended up saying her heart out.